The Church of What's Happening Now

The Passing of an Era

2010-11-10T12:54:00.004-06:00

It's a bittersweet fall day. The sun is shining and the leaves are glowing golden on this downright balmy November afternoon. There are birds chattering away in the trees outside.

Oh, so many birds.

The phone rang shortly after noon today, signaling the end of a beautiful relationship.

The Escort has ... gone to a farm upstate. There's lots of other cars there, too, and even some tractors and motorbikes.

As the tow-truck driver slowly winched the car onto the bed of his truck, well ... I didn't shed a tear. But I kind of loved that car.

P.S.
YOU GUYS! It's been a freaking year? Surely something is happening out there in the world of ... the world!

Hymn of the Day

2009-11-03T13:18:00.003-06:00

Happy November.

It's a gorgeous day, even if the better part of it was spent raking ALL the leaves ever. "This is boring!" quoth the Deacon.

Have a Hymn.

Ramen, everyone.

(this post brought to you by the night shift)

Sermon: Oklahoma is O.Krazy!

2009-10-08T12:30:00.007-05:00

So, in direct violation of HIPAA laws, Oklahoma has introduced legislation that would require abortion providers to make public the following information.

1. Date of abortion
2. County in which abortion performed
3. Age of mother
4. Marital status of mother
(married, divorced, separated, widowed, or never married)
5. Race of mother
6. Years of education of mother
(specify highest year completed)
7. State or foreign country of residence of mother
8. Total number of previous pregnancies of the mother
Live Births
Miscarriages
Induced Abortions.

Now, make any argument for or against abortion that you'd like but releasing that information is a violation of civil liberties and basic human decency. I understand the point of it. Releasing it makes abortion a less attractive option; this is simply a deterrent to prevent abortions.

Now, I think that it should be the aim of all sides of the abortion issue to reduce the number of abortions performed down to 0. The difference is that the radicals of the anti-abortion crowd thinks the best way to do it is by punishing those that get abortion. Not a productive strategy.

So what's the better option? There's always adoption. But Oklahoma doesn't seem to want to promote that option. If they did, they might fight to reduce the cost of adoption, which can range from $5,000 to $50,000. Or perhaps provide better funding to adoptive and foster homes.

We can all agree that the abortion issue is a tough one. But there's no one strategy that is going to make either side happy. Will Oklahoma reduce the number of abortions by following through with this plan? I could see a handful of women opting to go to another state, or possibly choosing adoption to avoid this public shaming, but I sincerely doubt it will have a serious impact on the number of abortions performed in the state. This is not the answer.

Thus ends your sermon for the week.
Please rise for the Hymn.

The Freakin' Deacon

They were threatening castration...

2009-09-27T00:14:00.007-05:00

Fucking Nazis.

Poland has approved forcible castrations for pedophiles and other sexual assailants.

Honestly, my initial reaction was "why chemical castration? Lets string them up by their sexual organs (internal or otherwise)." I mean we should take all steps necessary to protect people from being trespassed upon in the most private way possible -- especially those that cannot protect themselves. And that's what the bill is aimed at. And laws like this are concurrent with the American government's view on sexual material containing children: one of the reasons for the zero-tolerance approach to fighting child pornography (other than the obvious need to protect children from becoming victims of such heinous things) is because child-pornography (more than any other type of pornography) encourages sexual crimes. What better way to discourage crime than to simply remove the urge to commit the crime?

Sometimes, I'll get poo-poo'd on when I bring up the purpose of our corrections department. However, the original intent in the United States was to rehabilitate criminals. Now, I'll absolutely concede that we have moved away from that, and we now use it as a tool to defer, and more commonly to punish. But if we take the stated view of prison as the reason for sentencing people (that we are to rehabilitate rather than exploit), this type of legislation would fly in the face of our stated goals.

But that's not why I would oppose such legislation here in America. It may just be my jaded view, but I know that we would castrate the wrong people. In America, children can be charged with statutory rape if there is a greater than 2 year difference between those engaging in sex. While I don't think a 17 year old should be sleeping with a 15 year old, I don't think the term rape should apply. I'd say the same thing about an 18 year old sleeping with a 16 or 17 year old.

Now, there's no indication that Poland tends to use the forced castration in this manner, but you couldn't convince me that the American justice system can be trusted to use this option correctly in all circumstances. We have not shown the greatest restraint or reason with extreme punishments in the past.

This news hits the same week that we've been confronted with Mackenzie Phillips' allegations of incest -- the most egregious form of sexual assault and a violation of trust. As sick as sexual assault in all of its forms is to me, incest is one of two crimes that just makes me hate humanity (the other being child-rape). And being forced to confront these evil things does not make my opposition to the Polish legislation any easier...Hell, one of the most egregious crimes from Poland's recent past was committed by the sick and deranged Josef Fritzl. But no matter how rape and incest make us feel, it is important to note the damage that castration (even of the chemical kind) can do. Although we have learned that we can reverse some of the effects of chemical castration, there is no guarantee that a reversal of the procedure can be achieved -- and more importantly, in some rare cases, it is possible to be more physically aroused after being castrated. Does that really fix the problem?

Are we gonna split hairs here?

The Freakin' Deacon

Please rise for the hymn of the day.

What's Happening Now? Dance Party Edition

2009-09-14T18:34:00.002-05:00

Not much needs to be said about this video. Watching people dance just generally makes me incredibly happy. We need more dancing, choreographed or not. Although the idea of "spontaneous" public dancing needs to be done more.

Put on your dancing shoes kiddos.

Refocusing and Re-energizing and hymn of the day

2009-08-21T20:18:00.006-05:00

The above phrase is something that has become somewhat of a mantra for me. I think there's certain things that some people need to take the time to learn again. I'm currently learning that this is something I need to do as a father as well as someone looking for a job (cross your fingers for me, would you please?).

I figure this would be a good thing for me to do as a blogger as well. We just haven't been getting the updates as frequently as I'd like. So I'm hoping to blog it out once a week.

So in keeping with the Church theme, I'm going to try and focus on updating on Sundays. It would mean only one update a week, but honestly, that's more than we've been known to update. So now that the blog is over a year old, and we have a small gathering, I'd like to turn things around a little.

As for Science, Ian, and the other contributors, they can update as they wish, but I really hope to build the blog's readership.

I'd also like to take the time to re-post the very first posting we had here. I guess it's the closest thing we have to a mission statement, and it's something that I'm kind of proud of as it really sums up what we're all about. We're not a church that promotes one way of worship, but all ways of worship.

The First Church of Reason:

Welcome to our Church. We are a collection of Agnostics, Atheists, and Theists of all kinds. Our mission is simple: we want to create a new way of worship that exercises reason and praises beauty. We celebrate music, art, literature, film, culture, society, faith, history, honor, friendship, love, family and many other things of this and other worlds. This blog will be used as a place where we can openly and publicly celebrate these ideals, and show when they are being trespassed upon. Thanks for looking, and Welcome to the Church of What's Happening Now.

We're a Winner!

Hymn of the Day

2009-07-07T22:45:00.000-05:00

2009-06-23T02:01:00.005-05:00

There has been no mention of Iran here. I really didn't know how to communicate my feelings on this. But this is just the most egregious thing I have learned about the post-election demonstrations. Apparently the imperial royal guard has charged the family of a dead protester a bullet fee.

This is a very old practice that has a lot of meaning. I'm not a History professor, so you're gonna have to either trust me, google it, or learn symbolism. But this is something that has only been done by the worst guys (well, maybe not the worst guy).

I'm not going to proselytize, but I would like to offer my thoughts to the Iranian people -- people that are fighting and dying for something many in the United States take for granted, or just ignore.

Thomas Paine would wring Beck's neck!

2009-06-20T17:23:00.002-05:00

just...ugh

The two-party problem

2009-06-08T07:40:00.004-05:00

Many of my friends and family members know I'm yearning for a Republican candidate I can vote for. The closest I have come to voting for the big R was in 2008 with John McCain, and frankly that wasn't even close. Social conservatives and neo-cons have made the Republican pretty toxic.

It's not that I hate the Democratic party, but I am on the other side of the aisle when it comes to government size and spending. Of course the problem with this line of thinking is that Karl Rove and GWB's vision of a small government isn't much different than Barack Obama and Bill Clinton's vision of a large government; the spending is pretty close to being the same in non-stimulus years (a product of an administration drunk on essence of money-juice). So the proper response to all of those crazy problems we had to deal with in the wake of incredible fiscal irresponsibility (especially in the view of a Democrat) was to spend our way out of it, something I was begrudgingly on board with (given the size and scope of the problem, we had to do something, and damned if I knew what it was). And we're all familiar with the conservative refrain: Obama=Socialist.

Uncle Sam wants you driving one of his cars, writing checks at one of his banks, and using his health insurance. Are we saving the economy or headed toward socialism?

Now that's silly. The government trying to protect American wealth and conserve jobs is not socialism, especially given that these specific reactions were to very unique problems. If anything, this environment is closer to Corporatism than anything resembling socialism. But when I was lurking around the lefty blogs, this was a response offered by Liberal blogger John Amoto of crooksandliars.com (as well as the response given to anything even remotely bad that a democrat has done lately)

I'd like to remind Chris Wallace that Uncle Sam under George Bush gave us terrorist attacks, two wars, torture, illegal wiretapping, a stock market crash and almost destroyed the world's global financial markets and much much more in eight years. I could think of many more, but you get the idea.

Now, I'm certainly no GWB fan, but this cannot be the response to each and every hiccup this administration faces. It makes me angry that people think this is an answer to anything that is happening today. I mean (I know it's a long-shot, but,) what happens if in 2012, we all agree that Barack Obama is the worst president ever? No discussion, we just know, Obama is the worst president ever. What happens then? Is the answer still going to be "well it's GWB's fault!" That's just stupid, and it helps nothing.

EDIT::: To be clear, there are several Republicans I would -- and even a scant few that I have -- voted for, I meant for President. Sorry for the confusion.

Happy Birthday, Freakin' Deacon!!!

2009-06-06T08:54:00.002-05:00

For my ever-lovin' husband. I love you more than words can describe. Have a fantastic birthday, baby!

Not dangerous....Not at all.

2009-05-19T10:47:00.003-05:00

The Grim Weeper (aka Glenn Beck) is back. I can only hope this is some sort of Andy Kaufman type gimmick. Chances of that are not so good.

Gun sales are going up through the roof.

And let me tell you something, I really truly believe the reason why — a lot of Americans aren’t paying attention to this — is because they…does anybody remember the poem, you know, first they came for the Jews and I didn’t stand up because I wasn’t a Jew? Do you know that — from Germany?

In the end, I think this is the problem. First, they came for the banks. I wasn’t a banker. I didn’t really care. I didn’t stand up and say anything.

Then they came for the AIG executives. Then they came for the car companies — and I didn’t say anything.

Until it gets down to you — most people don’t see they are coming for you at some point. You’re on the list. Everybody’s on the list.

I'm not reading between the lines. He is explicitly telling people to take up arms to stop a phantom facio-Marxist regime from coming after them. I don't know if I should laugh or cry. If you have seen his website or forums, you know he has the fan base that are predisposed to buying into this silliness.

In honor of the NFL Draft weekend...

2009-04-24T14:59:00.009-05:00

I love this weekend. It's almost like a fresh start, but it never lives up to what we're told it should be. It's just a lot of fun to have the idea that all of these kids can take your team to the Super Bowl, even though it's about 50/50 that the kids make an impact the year they are drafted.

Given the importance of the weekend, I'd like to do my own little mock draft.

1.) With the first pick of the 2009 COWHN draft, the Church of Scientology takes: The talking Donkey from the book of Numbers. This pick is easy to understand. A talking donkey? What would get the kids involved in the movement of Scientology more than that? But that's beside the point, this Donkey has a higher Thetan level than even John Travolta's boyfriend (allegedly).

2.) With the second overall pick of the 2009 COWHN draft, The Church Of What's Happening Now selects: Job! After hearing about his hardships, the Church of What's Happening Now decided to give this man of God a good home after a rough season. Why is he always picked on? I don't get it. Boils? Really? Boils? Man, that's rough. Besides, his illusions are amazing (tricks are what a whore does for money).

3.) The third pick in the COWHN draft belonged to the Catholics but in a surprise move, they traded down (although terms of the deal are sketchy, apparently the Catholic Church recieved Martin Luther so he could end his career where it started), although they really could have used a good offensive lineman, the Pope made the trade saying "We don't believe in protection." (Waka Waka!!!)

3.) The third pick in the draft goes to the Westboro Baptist Church, and they select: Jesus Christ. But like John Elway and Eli Manning before him, Jesus refuses to join the team. "Apparently these Assholes weren't paying attention to anything I had to say. These guys are fucking nuts!" Jesus told ESPN (through ESP).

There you have it the top 3 picks of the 2009 Church of What's Happening Now draft.

For the real 100th post, I provide you with this gift

2009-04-17T09:04:00.006-05:00

I can no longer live the lie. I have seen the light some time ago, and Xenu be damned, I can't keep it to myself anymore. The truth is here!

Now, I'm not suggesting you read the whole thing at once. To do so would leave you a quivering mass in your own filth (THAT DOESN'T EVEN EXIST!!!!), your puny human brain simply could not fathom the great truth revealed within.

Human beings were created (that is, invented) via genetic experiments that were conducted by reptilian aliens. These reptilian aliens, also known
as the "Anunnaki" or the "Reptilians," still rule the Earth to this day...Ironically enough, however--and this is indeed one huge irony--by you worshipping science and thinking that it will lead you to the truth, you are actually preventing the Reptilians from ever being exposed. This is because the Reptilians are the very ones who created science. Therefore, you cannot use science against them in order to expose them; that would be nonsensical. In fact, science already has safeguards against this kind of stuff (i.e., according to science, despite all of the evidence to the contrary, aliens do not exist).

There. Flawless Logic. Space Logic, even; Dawkins eat your heart out.

Not to mention:

It is indeed tragic that men cannot satisfy their sexual needs without also getting trapped in a relationship at the same time (otherwise, they will be accused of rape, since non-relationship consensual sex does not exist on Earth, due to the aforementioned programming of women). Demonic enslavement traps such as this are the standard modus operandi of the Reptilians and Darkness. Now, just imagine if you had to buy an entire pizza restaurant just to order a pizza; an evil absurdity indeed.

Another thing that makes women insufferable is the fact that they are, essentially, babies. That is, they possess the emotional maturity of a 4-year-old boy. Women cry, throw fits, and need men to take care of them. Um, adults shouldn't need someone else to take care of them.

Is this really news to anyone? Honestly!

So you say to yourself, okay, I see the light. No. Wrong. I laugh at how foolishly wrong you are thusly: HA!

For you see, you have yet to discover Time Cube. But I'll save my write-up for that when are ready. Choose your path Neo. Choose your path...

Tumblr

2009-04-14T19:36:00.003-05:00

Don't really know much about these tumblr thingies, but I thought I'd give it a shot.

http://inscienceandcatgames.tumblr.com/

Anyone else know much about this? I don't always have my finger on the pulse of the web.

Crushing Your Enemies, Seeing Them Driven Before You, and Hearing the Lamentations of the Executives

2009-04-03T16:02:00.003-05:00

So, during my thrice daily online news roundup (Drudge Report, the Huffington Post, International Herald Tribune, BBC, heck sometimes Al Jazera) I came upon an article that piqued my interest.

Much of the these initial stages of the Obama Administration have been spent just cleaning up the mess of the last eight years. That is, getting the government back to work I suppose, not to mention the vast majority of time spent hiring and firing and deliberating on who works for the government, who works for the people, and who had an agenda contrary to democracy. Gotta love those slow creaky gears of the republic eh? You can practically hear Rahm Emanuel spreading grease.

But, many think (myself included at times), that Barack Obama will end up being less of a progressive, than the moderate-if not somewhat comprising, figure...closer to Clinton the triangulator than say FDR or even Eisenhower (come on, he really defended the New Deal from his own Party).

For instance, Obama reduced the real life issue of revisiting the country's Marajuana Laws to a joke, a jest, a media friendly chuckle. In this case the question was worded poorly. It asked, in part, that wouldn't the legalization of marajuana be a an economic boon to the lagging U.S. economy.

First, the step needed to correct the long lost War on Drugs is decriminalization. This question also overlooks the obvious. How much money has been and continues to be wasted on the loosing war? How much is spent criminalizing whole swathes of the American public and incarcerating them? How much money can be spent to protect people from a plant? Whatever, I am getting too far from the article.

So, my concern is that Barack Obama is too much a moderate, unwilling or unable to correct the multitudes of errors made this past century. Daunting task? You betcha. But then i read this article, linked via the Huffington Post.

Ok, so what if Obama doesn't posture like the macho cowboy or bang his fist on the bully pulpit. The real deal of politics is what goes on behind the scenes. If this is
any indication, we have a lot to look forward to.

Hymn of true love

2009-04-03T09:42:00.002-05:00

I've been on a huge Magic Numbers kick again.
This is one of those songs that just explains it, there's only so many words that you can throw together and have it make sense, but this is a perfect example of how it can be done. And as far as love songs go, it's up there with "Buckets of Rain" by Bob Dylan.

As well as the faithful readers of this blog, this is dedicated to the love of my life, Science (the person, not the methodological study of the world).

Just doing the Lord's work...

2009-04-02T15:35:00.008-05:00

New Chick Tract!!!

So many gems in this Tract:
- Bulimia
- Characature of Pope Ratzi
- Apparently the Catholoc Church is still selling indulgence
- The above attempt at connecting with the hip crowd
- The bashing with a broad stick of all religion
- And keep an eye out for what I think is Stone Cold Steve Austin!

Judge Judy and Executioner

2009-04-01T12:32:00.004-05:00

I'm not a big fan of Judge Judy -- of course I'm not a fan of TV judges in general -- But I find Judge Judy in particular to be shrill, annoying, and off-putting. But this piece was brought to my attention by an old friend from high school (thanks Katy). Larry King brings up Prop 8, and Judy Sheindlin offers a brief and stirring call for common sense (and yes, I get it, Judge Judy is not what I would call the summit of rationality, but this was quite a moving message from her). Plus if you don't like Judy or Larry King, you might like Larry King telling Judy that she'll "never make it" to 2013.

On to the vid:

Shep Smith On the Verge of Going Beale

2009-03-16T23:07:00.003-05:00

Here's a bit of fun from Shep Smith of Fox News.
Personally I've had less beef with Smith, he seems less of a tool I guess.
I've always wondered whether a FOX News pundit, pinhead, whatever would go ballistic on air. Of course, this isn't him loosing it, but I wonder whether his personal pride had been insulted by the FOX News handjob handed to Glenn Beck and his inane idiocy, his lowest common denominator appeal. Seriously, Glenn Beck is a wackjob who needs to have his comeuppance.

I'm looking forward to Shep Smith cracking (maybe), to let the freaky truth spill from his forked tongue, a la Howard Beale.

Think about it.

Two Buck Chuck

2009-03-11T16:05:00.002-05:00

Ah Charles Shaw, better known as Two Buck Chuck-really just Franzia, one of the cheapest wine drunks this side of Carlo Rossi. It's not really a Napa wine, but hey who's really fooled by that anyway.

This is one of the best adds I've seen in a long time.

Enjoy kiddies, enjoy irresponsibly-otherwise buy something better.

Never trust a man named Bobby Jindal

2009-02-27T23:34:00.004-06:00

Hate to kick a man when he's down...

What a guy
FD

Poem of the Day

2009-02-27T12:49:00.002-06:00

Bridal Shower

by George Bilgere

Perhaps, in a distant café,
four or five people are talking
with the four or five people
who are chatting on their cell phones this morning
in my favorite café.

And perhaps someone there,
someone like me, is watching them as they frown,
or smile, or shrug
at their invisible friends or lovers,
jabbing the air for emphasis.

And, like me, he misses the old days,
when talking to yourself
meant you were crazy,
back when being crazy was a big deal,
not just an acronym
or something you could take a pill for.

I liked it
when people who were talking to themselves
might actually have been talking to God
or an angel.
You respected people like that.

You didn't want to kill them,
as I want to kill the woman at the next table
with the little blue light on her ear
who has been telling the emptiness in front of her
about her daughter's bridal shower
in astonishing detail
for the past thirty minutes.

O person like me,
phoneless in your distant café,
I wish we could meet to discuss this,
and perhaps you would help me
murder this woman on her cell phone,

after which we could have a cup of coffee,
maybe a bagel, and talk to each other,
face to face.

"Bridal Shower" by George Bilgere.

Crazy Eye Beck

2009-02-27T10:37:00.001-06:00

I never watch Colbert and The Daily Show anymore. It used to be such a ritual but it's getting to the point where I'm lucky if I see an episode a week...That has to change! Here's why:

The Colbert ReportMon - Thurs 11:30pm / 10:30c

Truth From the Gut

Colbert Report Full Episodes
Political Humor

Joke of the Day
Stand-Up Comedy

For the Cat/Ninja lovers

2009-02-21T02:18:00.001-06:00

This is quite entertaining, and also will help my husband get to the ACTUAL 100th post he so desperately wants.

Edit: POSSIBILIANS Unite!

2009-02-21T01:44:00.007-06:00

After a week and then some of work-free existence, I was finally able to once again catch an episode of "Talk of the Nation" during my afternoon commute. The Tuesday, February 19, episode featured author David Eagleman discussing and reading excerpts from his new book "Sum: Forty Tales from the Afterlives." He described himself as a "possibilian," aka someone who believes that ANYTHING is possible.

I would kindly suggest that we have another religion to add to our blog poll. I would also highly recommend perusing the excerpts posted on the TOTN page, if not listening to the episode. It was enjoyable and thought-provoking. Also, it was great to hear some creative and unique takes on what the afterlife will consist of. Personally, I'm voting for that mystical moment between wake and sleep, where seconds stretch to infinity. As long as little girls don't creep up next to my bed while I'm there. (I'm looking at you, Madison!!)

Response to the "Off the Hook" GOP "Urban Campaign" or "Last Ditch at Relevance" or "Desperate Times Call for Desperate Measures"

2009-02-19T17:58:00.003-06:00

I'm out of quotation marks. Words cannot express the hilarity of GOP's...insert word, ah-impotence comes to mind, but really fails to capture the sad humor or the sheer ridiculousness of the whole idea of hip, urban, multi-ethnic?, conservative appeal.

Can the GOP make improvements in the 2010 midterm elections? No. Not at this rate.

Do I look forward to seeing Conservative Republicans working the street angle? Selling their crusty, crotchety agenda as something that is "dope"?

You down with GOP / Happy Birthday Alex

2009-02-19T16:32:00.010-06:00

First of all, Happy Birthday Alex! Hope it's a good one! As a gift to you, I offer this excellent news via Central News Network.

"Republican National Committee Chairman Michael Steele says his party is going to launch an "off the hook" public relations campaign that will update the GOP’s image by translating it to "urban-suburban hip-hop settings."...Asked whether that meant cutting-edge tactics, Steele demurred. “I don't do 'cutting-edge,’" he said. "That's what Democrats are doing. We're going beyond cutting-edge.

Do you know how hard it is to rhyme with Gingrich? Seriously, do they think this is going to work? What will Rush Say? This is the party that many pundits predict can't turn it around before 2012 (for the record I'm not one of them, this party will be here for awhile, but what with Bush the Failure and his neo-con brood, and Palin looking to be the answer to Barack Obama, I can see where there is cause for concern). This is how they are going to reinvent themselves?

Sweet, thanks Mix Master Steele.

MC Rove, please express your agreement with an awkward, urban break dancing move

Get your Popcorn ready. This should be fun.

EDIT: One more reason this is a bad idea...

EDIT: Not the 100th post! Still No content!!!

2009-02-08T19:32:00.004-06:00

Yep, this ones for me. If you don't know David, you should!
Here's Christian Bale taking this kid to task...He probably deserved it.

Why we need same-sex marriage

2009-02-08T08:47:00.004-06:00

I have homework to do and then it's off to brunch with my children (who got nothing but glowing reviews from their teachers). But I had to take some time to type something up about this.

As her partner of 17 years slipped into a coma, Janice Langbehn pleaded with doctors and anyone who would listen to let her into the woman's hospital room.

Eight anguishing hours passed before Langbehn would be allowed into Jackson Memorial Hospital's Ryder Trauma Center. By then, she could only say her final farewell as a priest performed the last rites on 39-year-old Lisa Marie Pond.

I think of all the gay couples I know and am saddened that this could happen to any of them because they're not married (and because the Government thinks it knows best when it comes to love). You know, I'm sure the hospital was just following it's rules set in place to protect privacy or some such, but this is ridiculous. I can't help but think it might have been easier for a straight man to get in to see his dying girlfriend of 17 years (although this is just speculation).

Bill O'Reilly vs. Christian Bale: Totally NSFW

2009-02-06T15:32:00.002-06:00

Glenn Beck's magical underwear is cutting off his cicrulation

2009-02-06T10:00:00.003-06:00

The night after Glenn Beck called Obama a Socialist (I won't embed the video here, because I've gone this far without posting Glenn Beck's face on the blog and I'm not about to start now), he turned his focus to Al Gore. Now if you do not know who Glenn Beck is, he is the poster child for the ideologues of the new conservative party. Every night he turns on his 'gee-shucks' charm and acts like he is a Libertarian pundit (I know Libertarians, he is no Libertarian). He decries liberals as Communists, socialists, (and now a new one) Nazis. Apparently, he isn't familiar with history, or political views, or words. Beck accused Al Gore of creating a Hitler Youth type movement that is taking the form of the Climate Change movement among the young people.

So if you're keeping score at home, Liberals are communists and Nazis.

In 1933, The Gestapo police force went from home to home looking for Jews, gypsies, and homosexuals tearing families apart and killing many, many people. They did this to cleanse society of the slime of society.

Recently Kenneth Starr (yes, THE Ken Starr) filed legal briefing on behalf of the "Yes On 8" folks to invalidate the marriages and forcibly divorce some 18,000 same-sex marriages in the state of California. The leading contributor of the "Yes on 8" campaign was (drumroll)...The Mormon Church!!!! That's right, the Mormon Church that Glenn Beck belongs that funded the "Yes on 8" campaign is looking to tear apart these marriages. So I ask you, who are the Nazis? Those that worry about climate change, or the ones looking to file legal proceedings that would invalidate legal marriages?

I know who I cast my vote for. I for one look forward to a day when two loving people can commit their lives to each other for the betterment of society. I challenge anyone to look at the loving couples in the video below and get me to understand why they shouldn't be allowed to get married.

"Fidelity": Don't Divorce... from Courage Campaign on Vimeo.

You! Me! Dancing! @ the Rathskeller.

2009-02-06T00:36:00.003-06:00

Tomorrow I will be singing and dancing to pure pop joy. I will drink beer and sing along with any friends that are about, perhaps new ones.

Here's a tune: "Death to Los Campesinos!"

Beers That Are Happening Now

2009-02-04T12:51:00.004-06:00

It's that time of year, big black beers for the winter. Beers that warm the cockles of your heart and gullet. Here's some of the Church of What's Happening Now's favorites of late.

Ten Fidy made by Oskar Blues, Lyon Colorado.
This Russian Imperial Stout, in a CAN! is a whopping 10% abv, 98IBUs is one smooth operator. Quite the malt bomb, with malt notes of chocolate, coffee, and some dark fruit. This masks the high level of hops in it, giving it a clean, bitter finish. Your Freakin' Deacon dreams of this beer.

Let's go local.
Lake Louie's Milk Stout, Arena Wisonsn.
Tom Porter brews some of the Church's Favorite beers, may he be blessed by the noodly appendage. This beer is somewhat roasty, befitting a stout, with a creamy smooth lactose sweetness. A wonderful beer for the winter. If you haven't had it on tap you are missing out. A drink of choice for the Church at the High Noon Saloon, most recently during the Ghost Town Council's debut as headliner.

Let's stay local or as Dan Carey would have us do, Drink Indigenous.
New Glarus Coffee Stout, New Glarus Wisconsin.
Much is said about "Drinkability" lately, mostly by the idiots at Budweiser, but New Glarus knows what is all about. This coffee stout uses cold pressed Just Coffee, a local, fair trade coffee roaster, to make this stout. The best part is the abv-at 4.8%, this is a session stout that is somewhat an anomaly, usually reserved for Irish stouts (Guiness). This beer goes down smooth and easy, with notes of roasted coffee, chocolate and cream.

Drink Local.

For my Husband

2009-02-02T17:47:00.001-06:00

I love this comic strip. And I think Mason will especially appreciate this entry.

In Honor of Dr. Neil deGrasse Tyson's visit to Madison.

2009-01-30T00:11:00.004-06:00

As I've said before, I'm a big Neil deGrasse Tyson fan. His visit would be great news for me if it weren't happening the same night my band is playing the High Noon Saloon with The New Mountain Kickers and Shame Train (W00T!!!). I'm not complaining though, and I'd prefer it if you came to see me (nothing personal Dr. Tyson).

Anyways, here's to Dr. Tyson...

The Daily Show With Jon StewartM - Th 11p / 10c

Neil deGrasse Tyson Pt. 1

Daily Show Full Episodes
Funny Political Videos

I Like Turtles

2009-01-22T17:00:00.002-06:00

Nothing profound here, but the cuteness factor rates pretty high. Plus for all our Portland parishoners, Jenn & Mason, Michelle & Dave, Collin and all the others that I don't know.

Crazy kids in Portland, who knew?

A new day

2009-01-20T15:33:00.009-06:00

I refuse to fall into the same mind set of liberal minded folks that believe Obama is the messiah and that he is going to solve all of the world's problems. I do, however, take umbrage with the fierce (and at times froth-mouthed) resentment that Obama has garnered before being sworn in. The weeks following 9/11 Bush's approval were up to around 90%. That means that 90% of this country stopped the petty bickering and rallied behind the leader of this nation. We are at a very important time in America's history, I hope we can see the same kind of unity under an Obama administration. I have my doubts. Rush Limbaugh (and his ilk) calls the whole Obama inauguration the immaculation (a funny choice of words for sure). It's a simple jab at the Obama faithful. But you know, I've never heard Obama say that God hand-picked him for anything. It makes me wonder what Rush thought about Georgie Porgie invoking God (he can't mean literally can he?) for his reasoning to begin an unjust and immoral campaign to kill Iraq dead.

Has the pettiness returned? For sure. But the reasons why are clear. We saw the exit of a President who, while Governor of Texas, Executed developmentally disabled adults, permitted unfettered and unchecked use of wiretaps on a free nation, and showed a callous disregard to threats to American security.

My feelings towards Obama are a little ambiguous. I've read his words, listened to his speeches, and have looked into his voting record, he speaks my language on the political front (mainly that the devisive nature of American discourse slows the political process). However, one clear thing that stands out to me...He's a politician. Whether or not he was the best one for the job at any point in this election cycle, he is still one of the few with power that should not be given to any single person (Berlusconni, I've got my eye on you!!!). All that said, I am glad Obama is #44. There are worse people to have in office than a Constitutional scholar and lawyer. Besides, we should all want the same thing for all presidents: we should hope that they can steer the country in a course that leads us to prosperity, avoid destruction, and create a society that promotes the rights of all, not just the majority.

Thanks for the memories Bush. If nothing else it was terribly, terribly interesting.

Happy New Year!

2009-01-01T19:39:00.003-06:00

Happy New Year my beloved congregation.

New Year's Hymn

2008-12-30T04:18:00.005-06:00

Here are not only two fantastic tunes by Stevie Wonder, but an amazing "this-could-only-happen-in-1966" mid-performance interview between aforementioned (16-year-old) musical genius and an awkward white guy.

There's just something about "A Place in the Sun" that makes me want to hug the world. And say 'yeah!' (which, Ian, isn't so very different from clapping hands and saying yeah.)

I think this should be considered Stevie's application for official sainthood in the Church.

Can I get a (r)Amen?

I'm using up all my Sabbaths at once...

2008-12-27T00:17:00.006-06:00

Okay, so I just saw this terribly blasphemous film (in the process, really) called 'Religulous.' I find it absolutely disgraceful that the Internet would host such filth (You can watch this abomination unto man here; ads may be NSFW).

(Please note, the above link was presented not for promotion of such terrible blasphemy, but so my congregation may easily avoid it. Piracy bad!!!)

Inspiration has moved me towards our latest Hymn. Presented for elder approval is Bob Dylan's classic "Highway 61 Revisited"

The Freakin' Deacon

Update: Just finished the movie and got to the thesis of the film: Religion weakens the hearts and minds of men, and leads us further into destruction (keep in mind this is a documentary and like any Michael Moore film, it follows the same template: discredit the other side, show them as weak and insignificant, and allow for airtime to answer questions that may have been posed by the opposition that quick thinking couldn't provide for). As a skeptic it's fun, but it's the wrong kind of fun. It's like watching World Wrestling Federation or eating at the China Buffet in Manitowoc -- it feels good to watch it, but only in the sense that it feels good to scratch a mosquito bite.

I think this just boils down to seeing religion in two different ways. Bill Maher (and Dawkins, and Hitchens) think that the fundamental problem with the world is that so many people buy into religion. I think that a fundamental problem with the world is that religion has a tendency to be intolerant of non-belief. But see, I can kind of see the premise behind that. If we don't believe, we don't get in. Our loved ones don't like that. I can't see the idea behind the premise of hating people because of their faith.

Here's the kicker though. The Freakin' Deacon, my mother-in-law, the average Jew, and the average Muslim have nothing but the greatest intentions for the world in our minds. But we get divided because we're drowned out by the Mahmoud Ahmadinejads, Pope Ratzingers (the Nazinger), and Ted Haggards of the world. I don't think skeptics need to assert that we don't believe (or in my case, are unsure), we need to assert that these guys don't speak for us, and not point the finger when some preacher speaks for the other side.

Just a thought,

The Freakin' Deacon

Nice.

2008-12-26T10:32:00.001-06:00

Christmas Hymn: A Two-for-One Special

2008-12-25T10:03:00.006-06:00

In the spirit of the "new Black Friday," I'm offering a basement-bargain deal on the Hymn of the Day, with two entries from The Flaming Lips.

Enjoy!

Be Peaceful, Be kind.

2008-12-24T10:55:00.010-06:00

The first celebrations of the winter variety came about around 7,000 years ago. In the land between the Tigris and Euphrates rivers, ancient Sumerians gathered together in the local school gymnasium to stare at their children on the stage. Historians aren't exactly sure why, but it appears as though they all showed up wearing winter garb very similar to ours; like us, they also didn't have a place to put their fucking coats for the duration of the show. It being the first Christmas show there were no songs to sing, or plays to perform. The tradition continued for several thousands until today.

The holiday season means many things to many people. Be they Jews who celebrate Hanukkah, Pastafarians who celebrate Holiday, Atheists who celebrate Christmas, or freaks who celebrate Festivus. One of the very charming things about this time of year for everyone involved, is that strangers pretend like we care for one another more (our advertisements even proclaim this). The truth is: traffic's a mess, stores are ridiculous, everyone's grumpy, and where are all those friendly neighbors with those fancy snow-blowers when you're out with the shovel?

I have felt this way about the season for a long time. But it's all bullshit. What really matters this time of year is not the guy in the Cadillac Escalade who can't drive for shit, or the person who is completely oblivious to being in your way at the store (do people get off on this? I swear to god!). The holiday season is, and should be, about the people you love. It should be about being happy, and being excited that days are getting longer, and that we are closer to spring (or the dawn of a football season that hopefully won't see the total collapse of my two favorite teams), and that (thanks to presents given by my Step-Mother, among other habits, rituals, and tools) my kids are a step closer to being literate and not frustrated by reading.

H/t to Alex for pointing out to me a new Atheist celebration that uses the spirit of the holidays to create a humanist holiday for those living outside of faith. It's called HumanLight. Alex nailed it when he said it seems a little silly and unnecessary, especially since Atheists have no problem celebrating Christmas. But the point is, we need to do all we can to make ourselves and our loved ones happy, and that's what this holiday appears to be about. And that's what our lives should be about.

Be happy everyone, but don't try to put happiness on your Credit Card.

~This Blogger is raged!!!~

2008-12-20T10:22:00.008-06:00

Okay, so this Amish lady, Rebbecca, goes to an airport to apply for a job as a flight attendant. Her resume is amazing. She can (and does quite frequently) cook for 80 people, she's really friendly, and is used to dealing with "the angry English."

"I have to warn you, the job is not easy, you have to know exactly what the needs of each passenger are at all times. Your job isn't being a flight attendant, really it's more like being an indentured servant," says the interviewer.

Rebbecca insists that she can handle it.

"Great" says the guy interviewing her, "we have a spot open for you, come by on Monday to start your training."

That Monday the Rebbecca shows up, and she breezes through the training -- twice as fast as anybody has ever done it. Even the simulations go great: she foils the fake would be terrorist, serves another cup of decaf, and gives little Johnny a pillow all while keeping her bonnet perfectly straight.

"Wow" says the trainer, we usually make everybody go through three weeks of training, but we all feel that you're ready. Show up tomorrow for your first flight."

"Flight? I can't fly, I'm morally opposed to airplanes and everything they stand for." says the Amish lady.

"So why did you apply for the job?" asks the trainer.

"Well I figured I could do all of the things the job requires me without getting on an airplane," Rebbecca says.

"Without getting on an airplane? But that's what the job is! It's even the title of the handbook, 'Being on the Plane: a guide to serving people on a plane!' How did you expect to do the job properly?" Says the trainer.

Rebbecca retorts "well you can't make me get on the plane. Where's my check?"

Okay we all see the problem here. We all like Rebbecca, she's talented, able to do her job, and has every intention of doing her job unless it interferes with her beliefs. But the story presented illustrates the problem with executive legislation pushed through by the lame-duck administration recently.

You see, a new rule grants medical professionals of faith to withhold medical attention if it interferes with their religious beliefs.

Says Mike Leavitt secretary of the Department Health and Human Services: Doctors and other health-care providers should not be forced to choose between good professional standing and violating their conscience

You see the problem with that thinking is that no one is being forced to choose between violating their conscience and their professional standing. This isn't Stalinist Ireland (just go with it, it makes sense). Nobody is forced into a professional career, these people spend tens of thousands of dollars to go to school in order to get into the lucrative business of providing medical care.

The far-reaching regulation cuts off federal funding for any state or local government, hospital, health plan, clinic or other entity that does not accommodate doctors, nurses, pharmacists and other employees who refuse to participate in care they find ethically, morally or religiously objectionable. It was sought by conservative groups, abortion opponents and others to safeguard workers from being fired, disciplined or penalized in other ways.

If I had gone to my job interview with Beans n' Cream and said "I will do everything except help people who arrived by car because I have the belief that cars are evil, and are destroying the earth," I wouldn't have been employed -- and rightfully so.

It's not like this shit sneaks up on you. You know exactly what you're getting into, and if you don't it's up to you to fix it by finding new employment.

My biggest problem with this sort of faith based initiative is that it always assumes people are doing good when it comes to making decisions in good faith. We live in a society that tries to level the playing field as much as possible for those that are playing the faith card. But it's bullshit. If someone is unwilling to give care based on their religious views, they are unqualified to hold the job. It's that simple.

The Freakin' (pissed) Deacon

The World Debut of The Church of What's Happening Now Official Hymn!!!

2008-12-17T22:23:00.005-06:00

Edit: As per my wife's request, I have added the lyrics to the Hymn in Block quotes (below the video).

So, I'm pretty unimpressed with the video. I'd like to record it in a proper setting (not a webcam and the webcam's microphone), this would allow me more freedom and the ability to use my big boy voice.

But I like the song, and I wondered: what the hell kind of church would we be if we didn't have an official hymn?

So submitted for the church elders and parishioners of the first church of reason's approval is the official hymn of the church!

V,1-
Oh Atheists, Taoists, and happy-go-luckies
people who don't give a damn
Secular Humanists, and all of you tourists
and people stuck in a jam
If you feel lost and lost on the cross
and need somewhere to belong
Come on in, you'll fit right in,
Just help us sing this song

V, 2-
Be peaceful, be kind, Use your heart, use your mind
Do unto others, as they'd do unto you
Take a joke, enjoy a smoke, and relax that old world view
Perhaps you feel mad, or maybe your sad, frustrated, down, and blue
You'll get no grief, come and get some relief, please won't you pull up a pew

(Chorus)
So we'll bow at the alter of Reason
and celebrate each passing season
Don't feel down, we're right here in town
We're the Church of What's Happening Now

V,3-
You can pass on that old time religion,
but pass me the comunal wine
You can do anything that you wanna do, as long it don't trespass on mine
Well if it feels right won't you please do it,
But if it don't just let it be
My friends are all here and it's given me cheer
Jack's all the Dogma I need

V, 4-
Don't wait on no fire and brimstone
You won't get none of that here
cheering, laughter, and music, is all that'll ring in your ear
The only vestment we have is a bathrobe
and we ain't never heard of a sin
our wisemen are women, our saints are our friends
please have an Amen (Amen!)

(Chorus)

Peace,

The Freakin' Deacon

Late and Lonely II: It Still Gets Dark, Return of the Grievous Angel

2008-12-16T00:41:00.003-06:00

Thanks to the F.D. for breaking the Parsons cherry. I've been itching to pop it. That said, there's just too much to be said about Gram and not enough music to be heard. I chose "Return of the Grievous Angel" as the song for this post. It never quits, it tugs at the heart strings, even causes some goose flesh on my neck.

It's probably because it addresses that good ol' poetic question that goes back to Odysseus and beyond, "how do I get home again?" I just love that question and the search for home is a mystery really. It's why we leave home or just ramble.

These lines always get to me:

"Twenty thousand roads I went down, down, down
And they all lead me straight back home to you"

"`Cause I headed West to grow up with the country"

Late and Lonely Hymn...

2008-12-14T00:51:00.004-06:00

Gram Parsons. I've been trying to wrote about this name for awhile. He was everything that was right about Country and Americana. He was Jerry Garcia,George Jones and Tumbleweed rolled into one. Throw in Emmylou, an Angel (type case) right here on earth, and you get something that we'll sadly never see or hear again. I was trying to decide what would be the best Emmylou/Gram song that I could post and I couldn't find one that matched how I felt. Instead I decided to post this, Emmylou's tribute to Gram. And what a tribute it is. I've already rambled for far too long. I'll let Emmylou do her amazing, awe-inspiring thing.

Oh, Snap! (with apologies to Ian)

2008-12-12T02:45:00.006-06:00

I've heard Geoffery Canada before; he was a guest on, I believe, Talk of the Nation, in the past couple of months. This is a great program, especially the idea of Baby College. There is absolutely a disparity between the haves and have-nots in this country; that disparity is knowledge. The more educated parents are, the more opportunity their children will have. It's not about money (or at least, it's not ALL about money). Knowledge is power; the more knowledge is available to parents to share with their children, the further those children will go. Even if those children decide to become English majors.

"My guest tonight wants to help underprivileged kids go to college. Well, if they major in English, they'll become underprivileged adults."
-Stephen Colbert, December 8, 2008

Ian, don't listen to anything Stephen Colbert says. I know you're going to go far. In fact, don't listen to anything I say. Or, if you must listen to me, take it all with a grain of salt & know I will make up for it in Tibetan sweets.

P.S. Tonight's post brought to you by vitamin Beer.

He's a Cyber Freak, Cyber Freak: He's Cyber Freakin'

2008-12-11T04:15:00.006-06:00

Today my dad sent me an interesting email.

It was a link to slashdot, a uber nerdy website.

The story is about William Gibson, a prescient science fiction writer of the dreaded American/Canadian hybrid. I have only read a little of the man's work. But he envisioned much of the internet has become, and how computers, cyberworlds, etc...have shaped humans.

I've yet to read the AGRIPPA Files poem, I've only slept about 5 hours the last three days, but I look forward to it after finals are over, as well as more good future-fashioned sci-fi reading over the winter holidays. Neal Stephenson's "Anathem" hear I come.

But I'll post it here as well:

Bud Cook writes "While the text of William Gibson's elusive electronic poem AGRIPPA is widely posted around the Web, it has not been seen in its original incarnation — custom-built software designed to scroll the poem through a single play before encrypting each line with an RSA algorithm — since 1992. Today is the 16th anniversary, to the day, of the poem's initial release. A team of scholars at the University of Maryland and UC Santa Barbara used forensic computing to restore the code from an original diskette loaned by a collector and have placed video of the complete 'run,' as well as never-before-seen footage from the night of AGRIPPA's public debut in 1992, up on a Web site called the Agrippa Files. There's also a detailed essay documenting the forensic process, plus a mess of stills, screenshots, and a copy of the disk image itself."

Here is the link to UC Santa Barbara's AGRIPPA recent past archeology of sorts.

Jon Stewart Says it...

2008-12-10T17:17:00.005-06:00

Because I'm far to busy to say it.

The Daily Show With Jon StewartM - Th 11p / 10c

Mike Huckabee Pt. 2

Barack Obama Interview
John McCain Interview

Sarah Palin Video
Funny Election Video

I generally like Huckabee. He truly believes in his convictions, and he isn't swayed by money or power (okay, well as much as a politician can not be swayed bu these things). His convictions are just weird to me.

To All Our Readers, Deacons, Acolytes, & Who-Have-Yous

2008-12-06T18:00:00.004-06:00

sometimes i check the site meter, not so much to see how many hits we get (not all that great), but rather to see where our readers are from. this helps me to discern whether we are just entertaining ourselves (we are & that's really enough for me) or whether anyone else, especially non friends & family, are interested.

so, with that, my call is to all you anonymous readers to comment. give us feedback or give us direction---is there something you'd like to see more of? (yeah i see that preposition dangling there grammar geeks)

kisses & cashews
cheers & beers

~ian

Classic!

2008-12-06T10:36:00.003-06:00

I'm sure the Church has seen this before - and if you haven't, you ought to. Anyone want to get together this Friday?

Medical Marijuana
Uploaded by TraceyUK

Winter Hymn/ Southern Hymn

2008-12-06T00:00:00.004-06:00

Last night Ghost Town Council made their High Noon Saloon debut to an enthusiastic crowd opening for Wichita Kansas' Split Lip Rayfield.

Tonight's song always brings a smile to my face. It's by the Mountain Goats, from the record, "All Hail West Texas". But for some reason this song translates well to winter.

Here's the words. Maybe my new favorite band will learn it? Here's to hoping. Hell of a job guys.

"she came in on the redeye to dallas-fort worth.
all the way from sunny taipei.
skin the color of a walnut shell,
and a baseball cap holding down her black hair.
and she came here after midnight.
the hot weather made her feel right at home.
come on in, we haven't slept for weeks.
drink some of this. it'll put color in your cheeks.

he drove from in from mexicali, no worse for wear.
money to burn, time to kill.
but five minutes looking in his eyes and we all knew he
was broken pretty bad, so we gave him what we had.
we cleared a space for him to sleep in,
and we let the silence that's our trademark
make its presence felt.
come on in, we haven't slept for weeks.
drink some of this. it'll put color in your cheeks.

they came in by the dozens, walking or crawling.
some were bright-eyed.
some were dead on their feet.
and they came from zimbabwe,
or from soviet, georgia.
east saint louis, or from paris, or they lived across the street.
but they came, and when they'd finally made it here,
it was the least that we could do to make our welcome clear.
come on in, we haven't slept for weeks.
drink some of this. it'll put color in your cheeks."
~john darnielle

Happy Black Friday!

2008-11-28T10:17:00.007-06:00

The feel good day that is Thanksgiving was followed by rampant consumerism and disregard for human life! The Most Wonderful Time of the Year, once again, leaves my soul darker and more calloused than a year before. At a Wal*Mart in New York, a worker was trampled to death and one lady suffered a miscarriage. Three people were also taken to the hospital. You know say what you want about our economy being in the shitter but we don't let things like mountains of debt get in the way of the important stuff like iPods, Blu-Ray players, and good old-fashioned trampling. The footage below is from Wal*Mart and a previous years stampede. No deaths occurred in the footage presented, so it really goes to show how much we Americans have stepped up our game!
USA! USA! USA! USA!
EDIT: Turns out there was no Miscarriage, that's good. Wal*Mart worker? Still dead...

Happy Thanksgiving!

2008-11-28T09:08:00.005-06:00

Michelle and I were talking about Thanksgiving yesterday. It has to be the closest thing to the perfect holiday. It has become a day that we get together, eat too much, laugh, and be with our friends and family. Unfortunately I couldn't be in Colorado with my folks and their always amazing Thanksgiving. Fortunately, I have family here in Madison that took me and my kin in for a Thanksgiving Dinner that couldn't be beat. To Michelle, Daiv, Tom, Keith, Sid, and Sonny (unfortunately Science had to work, her presence was truly missed; Ian and Norah were up North for the Holiday, and they were truly missed as well): I had a great time yesterday, thank you for helping me make it 28 for 28 and thanks for the fantastic spread. To all of you: I am truly thankful to call you all friends and family. Cheers! I hope that your Thanksgiving was as good as it could have been. And since it's never too late for tradition...

God Exists: Here's Proof

2008-11-25T10:57:00.007-06:00

Ann Coulter's jaw has been wired shut.

It seems that her mouth has been touched by the noodley appendage.
Now if only The Strap-On Veterans for Truth can find her elusive penis.

Great Billboard.

2008-11-23T18:41:00.003-06:00

h/t to Roesmary on the San Diego Dialed in Blog.

This is pretty awe-inspiring. I hate to be all cynical, but I wonder how many Christians question and judge the actions of these christians (note the type case)

Ghost Town Council: objectively awesome!

2008-11-23T09:47:00.006-06:00

I think I have a new favorite band. And check out the smokin' bass player!

Gave up the Bottle

There are more photos available here.

Sex: Keep It Funny

2008-11-18T16:32:00.003-06:00

Really, sex, intercourse, coitus,fucking, the monkey mounting the plow, whatever is your preferred nomenclature, is funny.
Just think of the look on your face, your partners face (i truly hope you actually see their face).

We really are ridiculous mammals.

This is from a wonderful comic Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal

Jesus Didn't Tap...

2008-11-17T11:58:00.005-06:00

UPDATE:

If I were a Lebron fan, I would have no problem wearing this!

h/t to Sweetser of the Death Valley Drver boards.

Words cannot explain these shirts unless there is some hybrid word for Insane and Hilarious.

Hey all Madison folk.

2008-11-09T22:16:00.003-06:00

The Freakin' Deacon trying to slide past you once more...

I started a new blog about Madison area Country (Folk, Americana, Bluegrass, etc.) music. You can find it Here. I'm always open for pointers and such so please check it out, and let me know what you think.

Peace,

The Freakin' Deacon

Life, the Universe, and the Economy: According to John Cusack

2008-11-07T15:21:00.003-06:00

i do not have a lot to say on this subject at the moment, but i wanted to post this interview before i forgot about it.

i will update and expand this entry and share my thoughts.
i hope everyone enjoys.

Petition for Sainthood: Studs Terkel

2008-11-05T13:32:00.007-06:00

Studs Terkel died October 31, 2008 at the ripe age of 96. In my mind he is more relevant now than ever. The man lived out his days in Chicago, he was not just a man, writer, radio-personality, the occasional actor (8 Men Out anyone?)--he was a man in the neighborhood.

Every time I heard the man speak, he sounded like a neighbor. When politicians speak of "Wise Old Men"--they should be talking about human beings like Studs Terkel. His wit and humor were surpassed by his humanity, his sympathy for the common person.

Although he was kind, he was a no-bullshit kind of guy. The kind of old-time Chicago man who had seen corruption, violence, & exploitation in every form--from the government, organized crime, business, and the bully.

Studs was infinitely quotable, as are the best of humans. Here is some of his wisdom from the interweb.

Chicago is not the most corrupt American city. It's the most theatrically corrupt.

I hope for peace and sanity - it's the same thing.

I want people to talk to one another no matter what their difference of opinion might be.

People are ready to say, 'Yes, we are ready for single-payer health insurance.' We are the only industrialized country in the world that does not have national health insurance. We are the richest in wealth and the poorest in health of all the industrial nations.

With optimism, you look upon the sunny side of things. People say, 'Studs, you're an optimist.' I never said I was an optimist. I have hope because what's the alternative to hope? Despair? If you have despair, you might as well put your head in the oven.

***my personal favorite***

You happen to be talking to an agnostic. You know what an agnostic is? A cowardly atheist.

damn right. i hope the wisdom of st. terkel will help guide our new president, mr. barack obama.

let us give it up, raise it in the memory of studs terkel.
to the kindest of rabble rousers! to us, the giddy multitude!
also, here is the link to his website

also, for your enjoyment, the man himself.

Liberals, God's favored Children???

2008-11-04T20:45:00.006-06:00

Remember this?

Do you remember the result? Of Course you do. Obama went on stage at Mile High and wowed the world with one of his awesome speeches.

Do you remember the start of the RNC? The huge Opening Night ceremony was delayed because of Hurricane Gustav.

Today in Wisconsin, I wore a T-shirt to the polling place at 7:00 in the morning. On November-fuck-4th. In a state that has gone blue for 5 straight Presidential campaigns.

Are you with me so far???

NEW CHICK TRACT!!!

Global Warming my Ass!

You Can't Scare Me

2008-11-03T12:45:00.007-06:00

This is a great interview with one of the finest Americans this young country has produced.

Pete Seeger helps me to believe in the best of America. That those with humble origins can influence the masses, AND find life, liberty, and pursue happiness is the most American of narratives.

It all puts a bounce in my step.

Get ready kiddies, the election is upon us. Let's blog the crap out of it.
The revolution will be blogosized.

Here's a little love for Deacon Daiv and everyone else. Screw the scabs.

Up Too Late Hymn

2008-11-01T04:51:00.005-05:00

I've been listening to Emmylou tonight, and wondering why I don't listen to more of her - or any music, for that matter. Curses, NPR, your nefarious plot is coming to fruition!!

I think this is perhaps the perfect amount of Dave Matthews. I do love his voice, but this satisfies any nostalgia I may experience.

Maybe it's because I watched some of a Steven Wright special last night, but I feel like the crack about the "politically correct world" and following statement are straight from his act. But imitation is the sincerest form of flattery. ("Nothing New Under the Sun" by Anne Fadiman - excellent essay about plagiarism).

Morning Hymn

2008-10-30T10:57:00.000-05:00

Don't mean to step on Deacon Ian's toes, but I found this and couldn't resist.

How timely...
TFD

Evening Hymn

2008-10-30T01:24:00.004-05:00

Tonight's hymn, brought to you by Beirut.

This song, along with the video, has dancing, mustaches, wine-n-whimsy, and a certain Gypsy-ness that is not entirely trustworthy. Hence, I love it.
Zach Condon is the real McCoy. Whatever Old-Worldness that he may affect, it seems genuine. From the various write ups, he sounds like a real-life globe traipsing tramp.

Enjoy. Lets bang the shit out of metal garbage cans. Raise some racket, hell and Cain.

NERRRRRDS!!!!

2008-10-22T19:47:00.010-05:00

John Hodgman warms the cockles of my heart. I will freely admit I have a giant nerd-crush on the intrepid PC; whenever I see those "Get a Mac" commercials, it makes me want to rush right out to get my own walking, talking, lovably geeky PC. (Or purchase a cupcake).

And now I find that "The Areas of my Expertise" is merely the first portion of a planned trilogy of fake history/trivia. How delightful!

Equally delightful is this interview John Hodgman gave to the AV Club. I'm pleased to learn that he will (eventually) be returning as a semi-regular contributor to "The Daily Show."

Add to all this that he will also be appearing in the final season of "Battlestar Galactica." Well, as he says, "Only the nerds will save the earth" (Hodgman, 2008).

Let's hear it for the nerds!!!

So would that be *unt with a Big 'C' or a little 'c'?

2008-10-21T20:06:00.005-05:00

So I was dining with my beautiful daughters tonight at some west-side chain restaurant. The place was virtually deserted, but the host inexplicably sat us next to a family of five (Mom, Dad, three tots) eating with an elderly gentleman (probably about as old as the Dad's dad, still able to get around, not decrepit, but retired). All is well and good, until eventually they started talking about someone working at Edgewood College. "It's a very liberal college, it may be a Christian school, but we're talking about a very small 'c.'"

I know this is nothing new, but this is one of those communication practices that gets me all pissy (as you may recall). So what my dear elderly friend was saying was that a good christian (notice the type case) couldn't possibly be a liberal, and a liberal has no place within Christianity (again, type case). This is no doubt the kind of guy that is going to go out and vote for McPalin (certainly his right, but I would guess he probably had his doubts before Palin was brought on board), because of his incompatible world-view. But what about his world-view? Does his narrow scope extend beyond Christianity? For instance, what about Hindus? Are the only good Hindus conservative? What about fundamentalist Muslims (using one definition from a conservative source yields us a person that adheres to strict cultural traditions with very limited Government oversight. Sounds a lot like the the theocracies of the Middle East to me), are they God's favored children because of their Conservative world view?

I know this sounds bitter, and I understand that this does nothing for discourse. But I just can't understand how these exclusionary principles help anybody. I know how it is when we get in our groups of friends, sometimes there's talk about the archetypal religious redneck that will refuse to vote for Barack Obama, but we understand that's not the majority of the people voting for McCain. Just as I hope this gentleman understands that not everyone that is voting for Barack is a gay atheist (or gaytheist).

Just a thought.

The Deacon

I'm so confused....

2008-10-21T14:40:00.003-05:00

How can someone possibly believe in God and the theory of evolution? Wouldn't his head explode???

At any rate, this is a very interesting article about one man's quest to unify faith and science, and make it clear that the two are not mutually exclusive.

Today's Hymn

2008-10-19T19:17:00.005-05:00

First, a definition:

Hymn
Hymn\, v. t. [imp. & p. p. Hymned; p. pr. & vb. n. Hymning.] [Cf. L. hymnire, Gr. ?.] To praise in song; to worship or extol by singing hymns; to sing.

I shared the blog with a co-worker who is quite religious. The term "hymn" offered some confusion, as did the whole concept of a church that is not Christ (or other deity) centered. My statement at the time was that "today's hymn" = "song of the day," not "song praising God."

Anyway - for today's hymn, I have chosen a song that expresses my joy at not living in Manitowoc any longer. Enjoy.

Poem of the ... Blog, so far.

2008-10-10T15:21:00.004-05:00

Truth

by Leonard Nathan

As children in the schoolroom game
whisper from one end of the class to the other
and garble the message they pass on or change it
beyond recognition, so we
pass on the truth of our kind.

My father heard it from his, something
vaguely involving God, and his father
heard it from his, and so on back
to Abraham, and so father
passed it on to me, but God had dropped out.

And so my son heard it, a wisdom
found inside a Chinese fortune cookie:
"Be good and hope," which he will pass on
to his son, but maybe with good
missing or hope, maybe with love added.

Though love was never meant to mean so much.
"Truth" by Leonard Nathan from The Potato Eaters. © Orchises Press, 1999.

This arrived in my email today, courtesy of Garrison Keillor & The Writer's Almanac.

I love the way it feels like my life - passing a story on with different elements from the story my parents told me. I wonder what tale my children will tell their children, how they will explain life, the universe, and everything...

Youd have me down down down down on my knees Now wouldnt you, barracuda?

2008-10-08T22:40:00.003-05:00

larger version here

this made me shake with laughter. also, i'm now a little afraid of ann & nancy wilson. they are not to be trifled with.

i hope they'll never find out how i've used "crazy on you."

O.M.G.

2008-10-04T17:31:00.004-05:00

I cannot even begin to describe the level of excitement this video inspires in me.

If there were any way for the Phish organization to understand how badly I want tickets to the shows (one, all, I don't care), I would be holding those tickets in my grubby little wanna-be-a-dirty-hippy-again hands right now.

the universe (revealed)

2008-09-29T09:26:00.006-05:00

if it can't be explained in comic form, chances are you need a new god.
i suppose the vengeful god of jack chick is a valid one too.
oh well.

Today's Hymn

2008-09-24T11:24:00.000-05:00

I told you I would go three-for-three. I know I didn't tell you that one of these was going to be a hymn, but it's not cheating if the hymn is awesome. And this Hymn is awesome.

Here it is, Tom Waits with the beautiful "Come on Up to the House."

Peace,

The F.D.

Modern Dance

2008-09-23T22:44:00.002-05:00

That's right, where's your god now, by jeebus?
Oh, god bless you Emo Philips.

Morality and Belief

2008-09-23T13:02:00.005-05:00

I had the great fortune of seeing one of America's funniest comedians on Saturday night. Emo Phillips put on a great show,despite attempts from idiots who don't know how to turn off cell phones and drunken bachelorettes to ruin the evening for everyone.

Emo told a great joke (actually he told it twice as he appeared to be a little befuddled by all the distracting idiots in the crowd). "I used to pray to God everynight for a bicycle, then I realized that God doesn't work in that way. So I stole one and prayed for forgiveness." This actually ties in rather well with the topic of this post.

I was listening to Christian hate radio the other day on the way to Baraboo (the FM transmitter wasn't working all that well, and I needed something to drown out the shit that goes on in my head). But before I tell you what I heard, I'd like to describe Christian hate radio (CHR). CHR is the type of good, Christian broadcast that exists not to celebrate God, but to destroy the thousands of other established religions in the world so that their church (invariably some small minded baptist church from middle Tennessee), stands alone as the paradigm of virtue in a world run by Satan.

On this particular broadcast, I heard the good reverend say the same tried and true line rationalists, agnostics, and atheists have heard countless times. "Atheists have no morals, science has no morals, they use their Atheism -- their belief that God doesn't exist as an excuse to unleash terrible acts on the world in the name of progress." Now I'm not going to get into whether theists or atheist are more moral than the other, that's ridiculous, obviously people of faith and people that have no faith live great virtuous lives and faith has little to do with it.

We can all agree that this line of thought is not the way all theists think, and I don't want people to assume that I'm picking on believers, that is most certainly not the case, and I also want to make it clear that I don't have a bone to pick with religion. I've made it clear that I have a deep reverence for those with faith.

But what does it say of someone that will claim Atheists will partake in all kinds of evil acts because they don't believe in God, and then turn right around and tell of a God that will forgive all sins if one just prays hard enough? What if Eva Braun killed Hitler just after he repented with all his heart and soul? Would then the murderer of 6 million Jews be instantly redeemed in the eyes of the Lord because he was no longer amoral? There is something inherently wrong with the line of logic pursued by the good Reverend quoted above, just as there is something inherently wrong with saying: what's to stop atheists from killing and raping kids (a question you'll come across if you engage in internet message boards about the question of God)? Well I don't know about them, but I don't kill and rape children because I have absolutely no desire to kill or rape children. I think it's wrong, deplorable, and I have absolutely no desire to engage in that sort of action.

All these stupid lines of thought that are spewed by either side do nothing to open up honest religious dialog, it only keeps people from wanting to engage in honest discourse, and if your goal is to get people to see the majesty of God, you are doing more harm than good to your cause.

The F.D.

Been too long

2008-09-22T16:03:00.004-05:00

Hi All, The Freakin' Deacon back with you after an extended unplanned hiatus. Ever since school has started it has become harder and harder to find time to blog it out (not to mention work), but I have some ideas in my head, and will hopefully go three-for-three in the next couple of days.

Back at it...

I'd like to start today's Sermon by pointing out what a Creationist is. According to Answers.com (yeah like I'm going to Merriam Webster's for this one, HA!), it is one with "Belief in the literal interpretation of the account of the creation of the universe and of all living things related in the Bible." I'm sure we could come up with some other definitions, but this is my blog not yours. So with that definition we can separate Creationists from many, many Abrahamic Christian Sects. Even the Catholic Church, who is often the last one to the party, recognizes evolution as the way we humans got here.

Creationism is the belief that God created the world in six days as described in the Bible. The Catholic Church does not read the Genesis account of creation literally, saying it is an allegory for the way God created the world.

So with that we can clearly see that the antithesis of Creationism is not evolution, the antithesis of creationism is abiogenesis. The idea that conditions were right on Earth at one time to harbinger very basic cellular life.

I hate to sound like Bill O'Reilly, but there truly is an attack on reason. And I'm sorry to be the one to say it, but if you don't want your kid being taught about evolution, home school them or send them to private school. Just don't send them to a school that teaches science with the expectation that you will change the curriculum to suit your world view. Science, fact, and empiricism don't work that way. Your world view (as well as your child's)will be accepted and respected, but just as there is a place for religion, faith, and prayer -- the school is the place for fact, reason, and intelligence. Dozen's (or more) of major, established religions have accepted evolution as fact. This is because it is the theory that logic clearly supports. The theory of evolution does not mean there is no God, this is something I have been saying since I started blogging. I understand you have faith, but if your faith means evolution didn't happen, then your faith doesn't stand up to everyone else's logic.

Humor

2008-08-23T23:21:00.002-05:00

I couldn't help it.
This is just too funny....for all you "The Office" fans.

Petition for Revered Elder: Neil deGrasse Tyson

2008-08-22T00:06:00.008-05:00

I can't pretend to understand what goes through the heads of religious people. There must be some excitement that they can only get through revelation. What I can say is that I get the same heightened rush (now this is huge for me to say) from music, reading, Super Bowl XXXII, all of those things provide the same rush for me that I get when Neil deGrasse Tyson speaks. I get excited. I want to jump up and scream Amen. I want to touch the hem of his garment. It isn't the science or the passion (both of which are just amazing), it's him explaining how we descend from a higher order. The higher order he speaks of is an order of the cosmos. And he's right. Look at the basic elements on the periodic table. Everything that we see, taste, feel, and and everything we are is made up of those elements.

We can trace these elements to the cosmos, and the cosmos brought forth life, but there is something profound and deep that connects us, and as long as we keep putting up barriers that separate and label us as Catholics, Protestants, Jews, Hindus, Atheists (and the list goes on...) we keep ourselves from discovering the true nature of the universe and potentially the great life force (and maybe even a G/god) that connects us. I just can't help but feel we're missing something here. And it's not that these religions are wrong (though logically speaking if one of them is right, then all the others are wrong), or that people should stop finding new ways to worship. It's just that we need to start making what makes us the same more important than the things that make us different. And to quote the great Bill Hicks, when we do that "we can explore space together, both inner and outer, forever in peace."

I'll shut up and let the great Neil deGrasse Tyson do his thing.

EDIT: More Tyson Awesomeness!!!

Today's Hymn...

2008-08-21T16:34:00.002-05:00

This is something I've been thinking about for some time. Basically it's just a chance for me (or other parishioners) to post music videos. The first installment features Gillian Welch, David Rawlings, and Old Crow Medicine Show doing the Band classic "The Weight." This is a truly beautiful song performed by truly beautiful people. Enjoy!

Another Death by Ministry case

2008-08-18T13:17:00.000-05:00

As with yesterday's post, "Death by Faith," this is a case where the apparent need for God's ego stroke destroyed a child's life. Full Text Here.

Javon's food was stopped in December 2006 - when he was about 15 months old - partly because he refused to say 'amen' after dinner, investigators were told by two children who had been taken away from the cult by Philadelphia police.

Members viewed Javon as 'a demon', the children said.

No medical care was sought for the toddler when he stopped breathing, and he died in his mother's arms, according to court records of police interviews with the two children and another informant.

You know, I have kids. My kids are not perfect, and have done some stuff that makes me question whether they can properly think things through and make a decision without thinking about the ramifications. But what kind of person would it take to just assume that a toddler is evil? And worse yet, when a five year old does something repeatedly while being told not to do it, you get frustrated, sometimes to the point where you really want to teach them that you mean what you say (in my case it usually involves taking a toy away, or reneging on a promise to do something fun, not starvation). But there's a huge difference between my kids and this kid that died of starvation. This kid was a toddler. A toddler. Knowing the thought process of a toddler rather well, I can only assume that the adults freaked the fuck out every time he wouldn't say 'amen' and thereby were reinforcing his ability to control situations. It was probably little more than a game to him (at least the first couple of times it happened).

But apparently this cult decided that a sacrificed toddler would be a glory unto God. Not only did they sacrifice him, they put his remains in a suitcase.

Now I'm not going to compare this cult to Lutherans (the congregation that I grew up in), I have seen first hand their goal of showing compassion to all walks of life, believers or not. And I'm not going to compare this cult to Catholics, Jews, or any other religion. It is clear that this cult let this situation get way too far out of hand, and a toddler paid the ultimate price.

But really, can someone explain to me the difference between letting a child die by withholding food, and letting a child die by withholding medical attention? Why will someone in this cult pay for this child's death, when the couple from "Death by Faith" will likely get off without any punishment at all? They both believed that what they were doing was right because of their faith. I can see why they are not the same thing, but I see a stronger connection to their relation than I do their differences.

Now I'm not blaming this on G/god, the bible, or established religion in general. I'm not trying to make the case that belief in God is an inherent evil (as many atheists do). I'm saying that complete faith in God without a touch of reason, or intelligence (using that thing that God put in our heads) is the complete opposite of what every major established religion stands for.

At Least I think so...

Death by faith...

2008-08-17T19:23:00.001-05:00

There was an article in the 8-8-08 Isthmus about a family that opted to let Jesus handle the healing when their daughter was faced with ketoacidosis (in its simplest terms, it is an abundance of acid in the body as a result of, in this case, untreated diabetes). Full Text Here.

In the days, perhaps weeks, before their daughter died of diabetic ketoacidosis — an illness authorities contend could have been readily treated — Dale and Leilani Neumann refused to seek medical care. They did so despite the girl's worsening condition and despite the urging of family members and friends. Instead, they insisted her body was a battleground in a spiritual war between Jesus Christ and the forces of Hell. Only by resisting worldly medicine, they believed, could she be saved.

Go ahead and read that again. I'll wait. This eleven year old girl, that should have been worried about whether an awkward pre-teen boy liked her, was instead a pawn in a spiritual movement. All the while, relatives and friends alike were begging the family to seek medical attention for the poor child. And the parents will likely avoid prosecution because in Wisconsin (and many other states) there are provisions that say parents are free from charges of neglect and abuse if they are using faith as an alternative to medicine.

Now I realize there is nothing in the article about whether the little girl had asked her parents to seek medical help (we can only assume that she didn't), but what if the tables were reversed? What if her parents had insisted that they immediately go see a doctor, but she instead wanted to test the "holy waters?" The state would then, assuredly step in, or bring charges forth if death had occurred. Don't believe me? There's a case of a child being treated for leukemia in Canada in which a boy who refused medical attention was taken into custody by the state who was going to make sure the boy saw the treatment through to the end. Just in Canada? Not so much. If these children were seeking faith heeling as an alternative, would they still be brought into custody for their forced treatments? It astounds me that people can look at some of these cases and deem that children must undergo these treatments but will look the other way when it comes to faith healing.

These people believe that faith healing is sound, they have to believe it, I have no doubt. The seemingly dark-age ritual is only around in modern times because of the Christian Scientist movement, a movement that goes back to the late 1800s. I'm not saying that this powerful organization with lobbyists and lawyers galore (if your God is so powerful, why would he need lobbyists and lawyers?), doesn't believe in its objectives, I just feel that if these people can convince others to seek healing as an alternative to medicine (which is clearly the case) then these churches should be held responsible for the deaths of the people that seek divine intervention as opposed to medicine. How many deaths by faith would we see then?

Children for Sale

2008-08-09T14:23:00.000-05:00

I love being a parent. The joys, the challenges, the constant surprises that come when you raise children.

Like your daughters playing with your keys and then locking them in the car. After you told them to unlock the doors. After they've been told multiple times that keys are not toys and they are not allowed to play in the car.

I love being a parent. I just wish my kids didn't have brain damage.

i think i am, at least i'm pretty sure i'm an agnostic. part 1: beer & cheese

2008-08-05T16:34:00.000-05:00

While most evidence and common sense and the burden of proof all point towards a Godless Universe (at least God in the big G sense of the world, and I will avoid the little g in the quantum or sacred/poetic sense), I am an Agnostic. Even though I am pretty sure that all the God stories and narratives are bunk, if not beautiful, comforting, and sometimes enlightening.

If I sound wishy-washy it is because I am an Agnostic. Wishy-washy, namsy-pamsy, flip-flopping and so on and so forth are common characteristics of Agnostics. The sort that can't committ to a consistent, while also a contradictory world-view-the type that's written into stone.

But, the real reason I can't committ my life and my choices to G(g)od is not because my brain is ssssoooo rational that I can't take a leap of faith or because logic or truth charts cannot prove or disprove belief. No, I don't always apply logic. I try hard to believe in every conspiracy. While enjoying most, I believe in few. A terrible leap of faith, but I try.

Nor do I hold a tenuous, if not trepidatious grasp to the possibility of G(g)od. I do not fear Hell. A place of eternal reality show snuff film where all your faults are flogged and boiled in Hellfire and sulfur.

Nor is Heaven a big enough carrot to dangle in front of me. The promise of golden streets and crystal mansions where all one does is praise the perfection of G(g)od and G(g)od's creation does not force me into buying any religion's particular narrative.

I believe in the possiblity of G(g)od because of beer and cheese.

I find beer and cheese, besides tasty and worth living for, to be completely mysterious. Just how in the hell our most ancient of parents figured out how grains and water and spices/hops/flowers and such can be fermented by invisible yeasts to create an intoxifying/nurishing beveridge. Amazing.

As modern humans we to often misunderstand and mock our ancient parents. How could they believe in magic/witchcraft/pagan what-have-yous? We have miscroscopes and germ theory and partical accelorators.

They figured out how to make cheese, a way to preserve milk, probably accidently.

When i drink a well-crafted beer, its smell, appearence, taste-the warm comfort of alcohol remind of mysterious things. The way starchy grains can be roasted and boiled, transformed into sugars and with the introduction of yeast it is all transformed into something completely different. Wonderful.

Then, during my rambly, if not somewhat drunken diatribe, I think, "Well man, you're in Wisconsin, heartland of Beer & Cheese."

Am I a product of my environment? I'm sure wine has inspired many-a-French(wo)man towards faith. And the Trappist monks....beer-making is a portion of a sacred duty.

Or, if I am not a product of my environment could I merely be in Beer & Cheese Heaven? The perfect place for me, I have merely chosen to go where I belong and be happy and prosper. Madison is an excellent beer-town in my and many other's estimation. Is this Heaven? asks the ghost of a long dead baseball player. No, it's Wisconsin.

Cheers to all my friends. Let's lift a few cold ones whenever we gather together. Heck there might be a G(g)od, but G(g)od sure as Hell doesn't drink Miller/Budweiser/Coors.

"We the Nation need to ask ourselves what's going on"

2008-08-05T01:24:00.001-05:00

This is probably the best thing ever. Sorry for the lack of updates. All three of you...

There is no telling how much this video made me laugh. My face hurts...
The FFD

The Future

2008-07-27T17:24:00.001-05:00

I think this might be why Michelle is so against entertainment of the electronical variety.

Woah, man

2008-07-26T01:52:00.000-05:00

I found this website interesting. I've read a lot about what Earth might have been like billions of years ago, but I've not seen/read much about what it might be like in the distant future.

Randomness!

2008-07-21T23:55:00.000-05:00

This guy scares me. The site comes complete with lyric - so even if you really can't stand to listen to it, you can read the pure silliness. But at least he's got a good justification for writing it.

An another note, I'm finding this guide oddly fascinating. I'd really like to edit something right now.

Petition for Revered Elder: Stephen Hawking

2008-07-21T23:28:00.001-05:00

This is why:

"Even if there is only one possible unified theory, it is just a set of rules and equations. What is it that breathes fire into the equations and makes a universe for them to describe? The usual approach of science of constructing a mathematical model cannot answer the questions of why there should be a universe for the model to describe. Why does the universe go to all the bother of existing?" From A Brief History of Time (1991).

Pat Condell is S-M-R-T...

2008-07-16T20:31:00.000-05:00

You can use the little arrows underneath the video player to turn off the captions...sorry it's so big (that's what she said).

Two posts in one day, I'm spoiling you.

I've seen some of Pat's videos on the Internets before but this one really spoke to me (I know I sound like a stupid Yankee asshole, but I really want him to say "a nod's as good as a wink to a blind bat"). This video makes a great point on the difference between Spirituality and Religion, a point I think is important and profound (a point I tried to make here).

Pat calls his work "Godless Comedy;" The first few videos I saw I thought to myself 'okay we get it you don't believe in God,' but the more I see of his work, the more I realize that he is an atheist that has great respect for faith (really he calls it spirituality, and I'll stick to my verbiage). What he doesn't like (as is made clear in the video) is Religion (the established pillar that preaches without Dogma there is nothing). Instead of seeing the church as a threat, he sees it as a hurdle that mankind must overcome in order to reach a higher plain.

Good stuff.

George Carlin 1937-2008

2008-07-16T20:30:00.001-05:00

I apologize that this took so long, I feel really shitty about it...

I really liked George Carlin. I thought he was funny, smart, and observant. He was never afraid to speak his mind. Religion, politics, the absurdities of life, Carlin was always ready with a quip that pretty much shows how twisted our world can be, in a way that no one else has been able to do in this way.

What you got from comedians in the 80s and 90s (Hey what can I say, I was a child of Comedy Central) were airline jokes, or they'd talk about how nice it is to be in Tulsa, these routines were all the same and all seemed to be taped in front of the Brick Wall of the Improv. The big guys -- Richard Pryor, Eddie Murphy, Sam Kinison, and George Carlin were different. They were the people that would stand up on stage and say "What the Fuck is wrong with you people?" George Carlin did this better than anyone.

What sucks the absolute most about this, is that we always seem to lose these people in a time when we need them the most (Lennon, R&JFK, MLK, Jesus). We are living in very important times. $4 gas, the clusterfuck in Iraq, the Biggest election in my lifetime (just to name a few), and we need people that will us the truth in the time of corporate sponsorship of elected officials, and news pieces that lack substance.

I'll miss George, he was exactly what this country needed, and we lost him far too soon. This is the best quote I've ever heard from him, and I didn't even hear it from him, but from my stepfather, the Great High Priest Bobbo: "If you're born in this world you're given a ticket to the freak show. If you're born in America, you're given a front-row seat."

Thanks George, Rest In Peace, give HST a kick in the ass then a hug from me...

The Fickle Media

2008-07-11T16:04:00.000-05:00

They just don't know a good thing until it's gone. Maybe this will teach them to appreciate what they have.

Sorry for the Incoherence

2008-07-09T09:37:00.000-05:00

The music gods have been mocking me. And you know what? I laugh in their faces, because I can listen to WPR all the way to Baraboo and back!!

I've been trying to solve my 'what to listen to in the car' problem in various ways. After my MP3 player crapped out on me, I turned to CDs, those archaic shiny things of the past. Then I got a disc stuck in the player and had to deal with the radio. There's only one station that doesn't fade out on me between Madison and Baraboo. Or so I thought.

I caught the beginning of a program on WPR last night as I was commuting and thought, "Well, I'll listen to it for as long as I can." I was pleasantly surprised to find that the station was still coming in strong when I got to work.

I know this isn't a really fascinating story or anything - but it does bring me to my point. The program I caught last night was a repeat of Kathleen Dunn's morning show. She inteveriewed Kenneth Miller, professor of biology at Brown University and author of several books, including Finding Darwin's God and Only a Theory. I've been reading Finding Darwin's God and wanted to blog it out once I finished the book. Unfortunately I don't know when finishing the book is going to happen - technically, I should really be studying right now.

Anyway, he was on Kathleen Dunn's show talking about Only a Theory. He made some excellent points about scientific method and theories as well as the need for teaching appropriate science in the classroom of public schools. He's a fairly religious Catholic, which was obvious from what I've read of Finding Darwin's God. And yet: he believes that evolution is a fact (or at least a damn good theory). Somehow he has found a way to reconcile his religious views with his scientific views, without practicing shoddy science. Amazing. I would highly recommend that the Church peruse his books, or even listen to the program.

'Bout time ye jerk.

2008-07-07T16:30:00.000-05:00

So, this lady named Julia Wertz writes a comic called The Fart Party. It's dirty, makes cheap jokes rooted in bodily functions and creative vulgarity (which I for one love), but it's semi-autobiographic and she is a genuinely interesting person.

Here is an interview with her concerning her time in Mexico as a Evangelical Missionary (which she is not, by a long-shot, any more).

Here's to dick and fart jokes and sensitive insight into our dumb human foibles.
So say we all.

Slow Going...

2008-06-18T21:21:00.000-05:00

But I can't Blog tonight. So I'll leave you with a funny comic that typifies the strange union of The Church of What's Happening Now. I don't know how the internets requires me to show props to the artist, but I figure that me sharing his work is the sincerest form of praise. But then again the internet is a breeding ground stupidity and backwardness. So if you are the artist, I praise you sincerely or you're an asshole, which ever one you prefer.

Also you owe it to yourself (all three of you) to check out the newest edition of Firefox (the third installment).

(To view the comic, right-click the image, and click on 'view image')

Welcome to the Church

2008-06-15T23:49:00.001-05:00

Yay Fenix!!

I'm so happy you've joined us in the blogosphere. You can soon start officiating meetings of the Rockies branch of TCOWHN!

So say we all.